The complexity of living by research and a constant stream of information is overwhelming. We are bombarded by advocates for one approach to living or another. There are moments in which I am stymied with the massive amount of information I am given. Which story is accurate? Is coconut oil the silent killer? Can I really consume 60% of my diet in fat and be healthy? If I meditate one hour a day, I will remain calm and at peace all day long. Which author is revealing some truth? It is so challenging to figure out which way to go in terms of living a healthy, happy life.
A Healthy Life is Just 30 Days Away!
On my path to be physically and mentally healthy, I’ve run across so many statements about changing your life. In fact, after a review of information about the Whole30 diet, almost every web site made this claim: “let us change your life!” or “change your life in 30 days!” or “your best life now!” From the Whole30 Program web page, “millions of people have successfully completed our Whole30 program with stunning, life-changing results.” Wow. Stunning! Life-Changing! The claims of personal satisfaction and transformation were alarming and hopeful.
Yet that healthy life, you know the one, where your children are always happy, your partner oozes with gratitude and support, and your body and mind are at one in union as you all flow on the path together. Yea THAT life. Does not exist.
Evidence-based living brings us to evidence-based anxiety and frustration. Writers offer contradictory approaches to diet, exercise, medicine, mental health, and just about everything else under the sun. WHAT is a person to do in the midst of it all??
The thing is, it’s hard NOT to feel like a failure at everything. In this world crowded with mantras of how you need to do this thing or that thing, how the only way to good health, eating, marriage, relationships, kindness, wholeness is to follow THIS approach! Truthfully, it’s all a kind of madness. I’ve come to the conclusion that all of the noise is trying to drown out one internal scream: the of the fear of death. That soundless scream is the thing that drives us to ruin; personal ruin or otherwise. As I make choices that are clearly against my best interests, whether it’s food or whatever, I’m running as fast as I can away from the truth of my existence: that I am dying and will die.
So, the ads claiming vitality, a better sexual experience, or finding the perfect mate are all distractions from the fact that whatever you choose distracts you from the inevitable.
Now, this diatribe is not a message of depression or a nihilistic view of the world. It’s the fact of impermanence. Everything changes and will change constantly. One moment life will be a glorious, joyful moment…the next a failed experiment in living. On my recent trip to the Grand Canyon (not so much a trip as a quick visit via Flagstaff), I experienced impermanence as it happened: the light moving across the canyon, the vistas slowly disappearing in shadow as the light of the sun descended over the horizon.
The light faded and I watched as the day changed to night, the canyon fell into darkness, the image permanently transformed. The light I captured in that photographed lasted seconds. Literally in a moment it was gone.
Trying to live our lives using all of the evidence around us is, in part, a good thing. To be aware of knowledge that can effect your personal outcomes is positive. At the same time, evaluating these pieces of information and forming those ideas into a coherent plan of action is a completely different process. Let’s take on these ideas one at a time.
Diet: a plan for eating is a good thing. Keeping track of what you eat and understanding that what goes into your body can profoundly affect your health. This one change is a real step in the direction of having some measure of control over your life. At the same time, it’s sad but true that the phrase “everything in moderation” is a killer. From my perspective, based on my understanding, there is no amount of meat that is safe to eat. The evidence against the consumption of meat has been building for years. While some folks argue that eating meat in reasonable quantities is OK, you will find a lot of evidence against that approach. Again, not a diatribe along the lines of “meat is murder”….a statement of fact based on scientific evidence. Briefly, adding meat (and the fat that goes with it) to your diet increases the levels of LDL in your bloodstream leading to a buildup of lipoproteins that will line our arterial walls and create serious problems for our bodies. Finding a diet that prevents such a calamitous event is important…deciding which one works for you the work that will take a while (for me a couple of years).
Stress: finding a way to deal with the daily onslaught of stress is a huge part of living a healthy life and stories abound of ways to achieve this outcome. Yoga. Meditation. Quiet time. Reading. Chilling. So many choices and paths to choose to lead you to a calm, more stress-free existence.
When it comes down to it, dealing with stress is about changing your mind. Literally, the way mind works has to be transformed. That, my friends, is a huge challenge. We have habits that are ingrained into our minds; like trail ruts of wagons that passed on the Oregon Trail, our thoughts are trapped in a sequence we have settled on years ago. To break free of these thoughts and emotions carved into our minds, it takes a huge effort. From my perspective, a transformative effort.
First, we have to realize that some of what we have been taught is fundamentally flawed. Here’s my thing: we have to abandon the idea that we can create happiness for ourselves. Yea, I know. We all hear the stories of how doing yoga everyday brought happiness to that one person on Instagram and therefore happiness is achievable through yoga. OR all you have to do is meditate each day and you will find the source of happiness. I think something got lost somewhere when folks attributed Eastern philosophy with happiness. If we were really paying attention, we would already realize that happiness is not something you create inside your own mind; it’s something you give away in acts of compassion. Serving those around you and not focusing on one’s own happiness leads to, well, something akin to happiness. So, want to end stress in our lives? Focus on helping someone people in your life. My daughters came up with a pretty simple idea: make food bags for homeless people and give them out instead of money. Simple things lead to positive results for those around you.